I was inspired when I came across this blog post https://notlostbutfound.blog/2019/11/22/if-we-are-honest/. It can be a struggle to see yourself as a writer or being a public speaker at times.
We think things like:
- I’m such small potatoes, I’ll never get noticed
- I’m not sure if I have anything of value to say
- This seems like just a hobby because I’m not making a profit
- I’m only doing this because I suffer from pride and I want to be more than I am
Ever been here?
Unless we believe in what God has called us to do, no one else will ever believe it either.
I think many of us are looking for validation from others before we step out. We’re looking for people to tell us, “you are so well written, you are a writer,” or “you have what it takes to be a public speaker.” Now, there is nothing wrong with looking for confirmation. I’ve been in places in my life where I needed confirmation before I could get that thing to be a resolve for me, and sometimes that’s needed. God will speak to you through a man or woman of God a word of confirmation, so you know without a doubt it’s Him. But you know what? I think many of us know what God has called us to do and we’re still not doing anything about it because we keep entertaining these negative thoughts. We are not taking every thought captive like the scripture says in 2 Corinthians 10:5— instead we are letting our mind run wild with thoughts of failure.
Every time I think I shouldn’t be doing this God touches someone to send an encouraging comment, I come across an inspiring message or I receive a notification that my stats are booming. Just seven months ago I was discouraged and felt like, what if this is a waste of my time? I’m putting myself out there and making myself vulnerable, for who? And, for what? But every time I tried to walk away from it, I would feel a pull and a tug to come back to it, but the discouragement was still there. Then I realized that just because my blog hasn’t flourished in the way I expected it to doesn’t necessarily mean I’m not supposed to be doing it. I needed to change my perspective. When I “really” grasped the purpose of my blog it’s like my blog started to evolve overnight.
I don’t know where you are in life today, but can I ask, is the way you think about yourself holding you back from how God wants to use you?
There are a lot of books out there that tell you to dream what you want and then go after it—I say, pray about where God is calling you. Don’t be afraid or be embarrassed to speak out loud what God has put on your heart. I was afraid for a long time because I know my battles with anxiety, I feel panic scared to speak in public, and even though it’s gotten a little easier I still feel nervous every time I publish a post— it doesn’t sound realistic that I believe God is going to use me to speak at women conferences or women outreaches or that I believe He’s called me to be a teacher of the Word. Internally I have asked, “Lord are you sure about calling me!?!” Yes, I know! I asked an all omniscient God is He sure like He doesn’t know what my issues and insecurities are, like He didn’t already factor that in.
You and I have to start seeing ourselves the way God sees us. And then get equipped! I am thankful for this blog; I see this as my starting point!